And if an year-old can do it ….
Success stories are attracting new groups to online dating, both young and old. In June , 11 per cent of RSVP's more than 2 million members were over 55, with a similar percentage now The largest group is aged 33 per cent followed by 26 per cent and then 19 per cent.patch.thebigbloomerscompany.co.uk/fepy-ctromax-y.php
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Just as many men as women are joining the major websites overall, but eHarmony acknowledges more females than males in all age groups over 35 - reflecting the gender split among singles in the overall population. The latest Australian census figures show more unpartnered women than men in all ages over The increasingly social acceptability of online dating has meant these large numbers of single women have recently become far more active, joining online sites and then actually approaching men.
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When RSVP started in , males outnumbered females almost two to one and it was rare for women to make that first contact. Now many older men revel in finding themselves in a buyer's market, on the receiving end of a lot of female attention. Some love it, others find it overwhelming. Online dating has become hard work due to the huge numbers, with some people being swamped with attention and others hardly noticed.
Facing such tough online competition, many seek professional help with the daunting task of presenting a profile that stands out from the crowd. In the US this led to a crop of new dating ''coaches'' or dating ''concierges'' - offering to help take the hard work out of the online process by helping with profiles, doing searches, offering strategies and support.
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Similarly busy professionals can outsource the daily grind of conducting searches and sorting out suitable prospects. With more dating sites starting up all the time, choices can seem overwhelming. There are now dozens of sites in Australia, including many for sex hook-ups, and a rash of new ones targeting specific groups such as the over 50s, usually attracting too few people to be really effective. People most in demand - the young and good-looking and well-educated, successful men - are likely to get lots of attention on most sites, from free ones such as OKCupid and Plenty of Fish, to the latest craze for the younger set, the smartphone app Tinder.
The Tinder app offers a heterosexual version of Grindr, a hook-up app that allows gays to check out local action. With Tinder, potential matches living locally are judged hot or not - on the basis of a photo and perhaps a tagline or two - and with a flick of the finger accepted or discarded. This process is not for the faint-hearted.
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Those with less obvious attractions need to work much harder, choose their dating site carefully and make sure everything is working for them. Take professional women seeking to find a partner from the sparsely stocked pond of well-educated men. Even for women in their 30s the outlook can be grim. According to census figures, almost one in four women in their 30s who have a tertiary degree won't find well-educated men of the same age - there are only 85, unattached 30s' graduate men for , single graduate women.
This means graduate women must find a website with the largest possible pool of these highly eligible men - less likely to be found on the free sites - and one where they choose their own search criteria to find the best prospects. RSVP also enables members to remain anonymous by hiding profile photos, a major attraction for women in big jobs nervous about their public reputations.
Having posted an online profile, professional women can't afford to sit back and wait to be approached, particularly if they are not displaying their photos. Many men limit their search to profiles with pictures. Yet women can still do well if they are prepared to make the first move - on RSVP they can show the photos privately to men they approach.
It's surprising how women resist taking that initiative. That's one of the most perplexing discoveries from my recent work as a dating coach - old-fashioned s' dating rules still have a firm grip on many otherwise cluey women. They trot out all the old cliches - like ''men prefer to be the hunter'' and ''they don't like pushy women''. Obviously there are some men like this but most male clients report being delighted to be approached, particularly when the woman pays for that vital first contact.
That's a bridge too far for Sydney divorcee Diane Rymple, 54, who has been using RSVP for more than three years under the name ''ladylikestodance''. She's willing to make the first approach, sending free ''kisses'' to prospective dates letting them know she's interested in making contact. Often they respond positively to her attractive photos showing bright-red lipstick and a wide, warm smile. A chivalrous man will have the breeding to be willing to make that move,'' she says. It doesn't help that she's set her sights high - quite literally. She is centimetres and limits her search to the small pool of professional men more than centimetres.
When I tower over a gentleman it doesn't feel right. It isn't easy teaching people that they need to be more realistic about what they are looking for - they can't date anyone they can't attract. It's particularly difficult with older women whose last date was 30 years ago when they were in their prime, knocking young men back like flies. Many don't take kindly to rejection - the dating world is full of women complaining they meet only losers, hardly the attitude likely to turn their luck around.
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